A Phone Call

I received an interesting phone call last month.  The boy we used to foster, Adam, his mom called.  She asked if I would consider adopting Adam.  The phone call was short so I did not know if she was serious or not.  A couple of days later we got a call from Adam's mom's social worker asking if I could come to the office and meet with her.  Apparently Adam's mom just had her fifth child and she truly is wanting to give Adam up for adoption. 

These past few months have been wonderful.  Our lives seem to be settled, not too rushed, nor too chaotic.  While I have always enjoyed my kids they have recently become helpful and less of a chore.  Our new boarding student this year is extremely polite and he is also helpful.  Because of their help I am able to spend the majority of my day (while they are at school) working with the ministry.  I have less chores to do around my house so when they leave for school I can leave to run errands.  This makes the idea of adopting Adam a very difficult decision for me.  I am comfortable with the way things are.

Before I met with the social workers on Thursday both Regan and I decided that if there were a chance that Adam could be adopted internationally that would be our first choice.  For Regan, it is not about whether or not he loves Adam but rather what is best for Adam.  In Regan's mind the only way we are an option for adopting Adam is if Adam is unable to be adopted internationally.  While my heart still loves Adam my practical and grounded side agrees with Regan.  I went to the meeting with full expectation that Zhu Yue wanted Adam to be adopted by anyone.  After a few minutes of small talk I asked the 'pivotal' question "Would Zhu Yue consider Adam for an international adoption?  He would be much better served by the American or Canadian education systems so this is probably the best option for Adam."  The social worker looked at me like I had just asked to put Adam in another abusive home.  Her response was a definitive, "Zhu Yue wants you to adopt him or else she wants him to be in the Taiwanese orphanage/foster care system."  This response from the social worker has put Regan and I in a position where we are now having to make a decision.

All of our children are aware of the decision we are making.  They have been told that adding Adam would mean sacrifices for them too.  Since he was abused he may have some delays.  Since he cannot speak English this will mean they will have to help him feel welcome using their Chinese.  This also means that they will have to forego some of the 'fun' things that they are used to doing and having because another child means more expenses.  After telling them this we asked them their opinion about adopting Adam.  They responded with a resounding 'YES'.

Please pray for us as we talk about the pros and cons of adding another child to our family.  We both know that God's will 'trumps' all of the pros and cons so pray especially that we would know God's will for Adam.  It is very easy for me to get emotional as I look back at the photos of him and it is very easy for my heartstrings to be pulled.  It would take very little for me to forget all of the difficulties of adding another child if I were sure that is what we were supposed to do.  I want both Regan and I to hear God's voice LOUD and CLEAR as we make this life-changing decision.